An Alternative to A Life of Healing

While I do hope to avoid arguing the merits or validity of seeing ourselves as primarily and essentially wounded and on a lifelong quest for wholeness via healing, I would like to offer another perspective on wholeness that may disagree with and/or upset some. This perspective is pointed at by the Mystical Traditions of the East and West, and one in which we begin with the understanding of our innate and eternal perfection. This view could be summarized as:

We are distracted from our always already wholeness and limitlessness, by a fundamental mistaken identification with un-wholeness and limitation (ie the idea of 'me').

This paper is a brief attempt to do 2 things: First, to outline an alternative to the plethora of approaches that focus on wounded-ness, broken-ness, and healing towards wholeness, and instead offer a way of seeing ourselves as Beings beyond healing, always already whole and perfect. I see little offered regarding this way of seeing and being, and feel a call to voice another perspective of wholeness. Second, I hope to use words as skillful 'pointers' in an effort to help you see FROM this perspective. For that to happen these words must point beyond themselves, and also beyond the realm of healing, 'you' and 'me', and toward the ever-present wholeness that is completely here and now.

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I wish no disrespect to those that offer their essential services as Healers, but much of what I hear passed off as 'Spirituality', is really egoic and bodily strengthening and fortification. It's about feeling good and creating a bigger and healthier 'me'. Spirituality does not necessarily make 'you' feel good or healthier. Spirituality makes the idea of 'you' transparent. While a certain amount of stability is desired prior to risking a move into the deeper realms of Spirituality, the notions of 'I', 'me', and 'mine', 'feeling good', and 'personal identity' is of the realm of ego, which itself is but a ripple on the Great Ocean of Spirit. Spirit is about Truth (not 'my' truth), Reality (not 'my' reality), may or may not feel good, and is beyond (but includes) the personal identity of 'me'.

These days I read and hear the use of many catch phrases such as 'nurture your Spirit self' and 'grow your sacred Spirit' and 'heal your Spirit', as if Spirit belongs to the realms of the personal self, growth, and cultivation. As if Spirit is some tool or possession to be manipulated by a personal 'me' to make me feel good. Actually, upon close inspection and sustained scrutiny (i.e. meditation/present moment awareness/clear seeing) this self that we mistakenly believe has a Spirit, is really a contraction IN Spirit, an expression BY Spirit, or a gesture OF Spirit. To say Spirit belongs to 'you' or 'me', is like saying the ocean belongs to the waves, the sun belongs to its light, or the sky belongs to the clouds. I don't HAVE a Spirit; I am a unique expression OF Spirit, never to come this way again.

The idea of a whole 'self' is an oxymoron. This is because the 'self', by its very nature, is merely a contraction, expression, or gesture within the whole, and can never itself be the whole. You as a 'me' can never be whole, and trying to construct a whole 'me' is like trying to create a perfect mirage to quench your thirst. Mirages are meant to be playfully recognized as such then seen through, lest we become distracted and never drink the water we are neck-deep in! Chasing the fantasy of future wholeness is to project and chase an idea in time, and thereby miss the only moment wholeness will ever be found. That moment is happening now!

With all due respect to what many say, we can not heal our Life. Why? Simply because Life is not a symptom or illness to be healed. Life is not a problem to be solved or fixed. Our idea that it is a problem, IS the problem. Our fantasy of a sanitary and hygienic Life is itself a problem, and only serves to obscure and distract us from our true identity (Spirit), which is what we are by birthright. Our true identity is also beyond the need to heal.

Now with all that said, allow me to say that I have immense compassion for those that are suffering. I work on a Dual Diagnosis unit in a psychiatric hospital, and I am surrounded by tremendous suffering. Yes, there is useful (but not essential) healing to be done. As the wounded 'me' is healed, it no longer distracts us from our True Nature. Healing the 'me' may help us to see what is, and always was the case - Perfection!

But what are we then, if not shipwrecked and wounded on the shores of Life? Let me try to direct you to that answer by asking some questions. What is THAT, that is Aware of suffering? What is THAT, that is the silent empty space from which all thoughts, emotions, sensations, and experiences arise and fall? Look into Awareness right now, and try to find a boundary that defines your 'self', your 'me'. Let me guarantee you, you will never find one. You will only ever find more ideas and fleeting experiences arising and falling in the limitless expanse of what you truly are. What you truly are IS freedom, IS peace, IS silence, IS wholeness by Nature. What you truly are IS what you have been looking for all along, but have been missing because you look for IT in a future 'me'.

What I am is AM-NESS, before I am a 'me', right here and now! AM-NESS IS wholeness, and the 'me' is a contraction or limitation WITHIN that AM-NESS.

One of the first steps toward this kind of seeing and being is to loosen our death-grip on the idea that we are wounded, imperfect, and need to continuously heal. We might start by seeing through the delusion of a better tomorrow where the 'me' will finally be healed and whole. Tomorrow may or may not be better, the 'me' may or may not be healed, but the realm of Spirit is beyond (but includes) a 'me' that needs healing, and is always and forever whole, here and now.

I hope these words may help you to be what you truly are, and allow you to see your innate and always already wholeness and giftedness to share with the world.

Aaron McNaught is an Educator, Consultant, Author, Psychiatric Nurse and Certified Hypno-Therapist, specializing in 'De-hypnosis' & Waking Up, as it relates to healing, growth, and beyond. He is living in Red Deer Alberta Canada and can be contacted at wakingup@shaw.ca